My kid

It's holiday! Time for resting, taking a break from those noisy kids...
Now, how do I get rid of my kid?

Games

It's the last week before holyday...
Why can't we play games?
Ok, then! I know a game...
Yupii!
A green-eyed woman marries a blue-eyes man. What's the chance their son to be blue-eyed?
I hate teachers' games...

French

So, the new French teacher, Jacques. Is he...?
No! Just because he is sensitive, delicate and cultured doesn't mean...
I was just wandering if he is married...
Ohhh... Kind of...

Fantastique

Jacques, there's this new place near my house... you'll love it...
Seriously? Taking the French teacher for a croissant? What a cliche...
Fantastique!

Birthday

Man, I found out in orkut that tomorrow is the teacher's birthay. I should give him a gift...
"I've heard that tomorrow it the teacher's birthday..."
People! Tomorrow the teacher is celebrating...
Honey, I'm home from school...
I can't believe those are more apples... your students have absolutely no creativity...

Colors

Your projector is mixing up all the colors.
No, it's not!
Are you joking? Are you colorblind?
As a matter of fact, I am.
Uau... may I mention this in my genetics class?
Sure!
Then, what about your parents? Do you have colorblind brothers? Sisters?
There I go... Guinea pig again!

I don't like

 Sorry Sir, but I don't like Biology. I like Chemistry...
Sorry Mrs, but I don't like Chemistry. I like Physics...
Sorry Sir, but I don't like Physics. I like Biology...
So, Fifi said she likes Biology?
Fifi Really said she likes Physics?
And she said she likes Chemistry?

German 1

Sir, can you help me with this question?
Just a moment! I'm finishing my homework...
You mean, finishing to correct our homework?
Nope! My homework... Now I study german...
Hehehe! Now you remember how we feel about it...
If you make me stop, you will see...

More responsible

What a mess! I expected you to be more responsible...
What a mess! I expected you to be more responsible...

Doubt

Sir, I have a doubt. DNA is stable, right?
But RNA is unstable, right?
Sir, DNA is long, right?
Is that why RNA is smaller?
You gotta be kidding...

Quote 2

Meaning of life. Idiosyncrasy. Perserverance.
"I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework" Lily Tomlin as Edith Ann.

Quote 1

"If you think your teacher was tough wait until you get a boss. He doesn't have the tenure" Bill Gates.

"D"

Sir, why did you give me a "D"?
Because I was in good mood...

I love genetics

 I love genetics! Genes, alleles, inheritance... biochemistry is fantastic! ATPase, fatty acids, nucleic acids... what are you doing?
I'm wandering where they've put the electrodes.

I love Biology

I love Biology!
Seriously?
Why? Don't you believe me?
I believe! I am just too used to be the only one around that likes it...

Drama lesson

This is a drama lesson! Speak up! Be confident! Come on! Loud and proud...
I didn't do my homework!
Way better... Hei! What did you say?

Gadgets

Have you seen my new iPod?
Uau! And look at this pink cover!
Have you seen my new datalogger?
Yeah! And look at these light sensors!

When he comes by bike

6:00, 6:40, 6:50
Good morning class!
I hate when he comes by bike...

Headmaster

Very interesting your perspective, Angy.
I think it's an idiosyncrasy!
But, what about...
To break this paradigm we need...
...!
Your lesson is really old fashioned. Students static, you talking... modern teaching involves participation! You must improve your teaching skills urgently!
But, but... Headmaster... I was... they were...
Idiosyncrasy! How about... Indeed! I still think...

No test on Monday

So, you don't wanna have a test on monday?
No!
Ok then! No test. At all...
Yes!
Ahhh, but how we'll be assessed then?
Don't worry...
The final exam can always be longer...
Nooo!

Procrastination

Sir, please! You must postpone the test...
Because...
Because this will give us more time to study and...
You mean "more time" to procrastinate your studies?
... so I postponed the test! Now I won't be able to procrastinate marking them during all weekend. I wonder if students will ever think about my needs?

Flowers

I brought you flowers...
Ohhh...
Now let's cut them open for the botanic lesson!
For a second I thought he was being nice...
Petal me, sepal me not, stamen me...

Alienation

You all watch too much television! Students' alienation is all TV's fault!
Triiiim...
Honey, don't you have those reports to finish marking?
Just a few more minutes, please?

Full of teachers

Can you imagine a bus full of teachers?
Boooriiing... boring.
The wheels on the bus go round and round...
Hey! Who knows Macarena?

Teachers meeting

Hey, where are the teachers going?
Teachers meeting, conference... whatever.
Really? They meet? I though they lived here!
Haha, hohoho, uhu, eeeeee.

Late

Wake up! Your brother is almost ready!
Hurry up! Your brother is waiting in the car!
C'mon! Beep! Beep!
Late again?
It's my brother! He oversleeps and makes me arrive late...

Turn off the tv

Turn off the tv and finish your work!
But it's an educational programme...
I don't believe "Dr. House" counts as educational...
I am learning new ways to twist my students minds... Uh! "Hell's Kitchen" certainly counts for teachers' education.
Go back to work!

Isn't that beautiful?

The NAD+ gets the electron and becomes NADH that takes them to the mitochondria membrane proteins carriers which pumps protons and delivers the electrons to the O2 to make H2O...
Isn't that beautiful?
I think I'm having a stroke...

Bad news

I have bad news. Yesterday I fell from my bike... but these are not the bad news... bad news are... I marked the test after the fall in pain and bad mood... here they are...

Genius

D-? I think I'm a genius. After all, Darwin wasn't also a good student.
You mean "Einstein"?
Aha! So you agree!

Essay

So, what's your extended essay theme?
"Ultrasonic mating call of the Namibian wild boar" or "ultrasonic hunting of the Mongolian cave bats" or what about "ultrasonic fight flight of the Surinamese giant butterfly"? He is picking on me!

Masks

The masks are for body language training... so they won't rely on their faces to show emotions...
But why isn't Johny wearing a mask?
He doesn't need a mask to not show any emotions.

Not to be

To be or not to be!
I've seen this before...
It's from that movie...
This theater people love to plagiarize from the cinema...

Drama

You don't understand! It's a tragedy! You didn't do your homework!
Who's this? Did she loose her mind?
She is always like this... You know... Drama teacher...

Nerve impulses

Today we'll discuss nerve impulses...
ZZZZZZ
Brain cells...
Clearly it won't be a practical lesson.

Genealogy 2

So, your grandparents are cousins, your parents are cousins as well and you date your cousin? It's impressive how you are pretty much normal... now thinking, your brother kind of looks like wolverine, hehe.

Genealogy

Wait! I don't understand, your grandparents are cousins? And your parents are cousings as well? What are you people? The royal family?

Not reproduction

Not Reproduction Class Anymore
... filtered by the kidneys, right everybody?
Still in the crowd rush?
Yeah...

Reproduction 4

Reproduction class
Blah, blah, blah, blah... but this birth control method is only 99% safe
Only 99% safe?! Oh my God! Are you sure? Oh my God! Oh my God!
I am 99% sure I am having a headache...

Reproduction 3

Reproduction class
In the first lesson we'll study reproduction in plants... the gymnosperm...

Reproduction 2

Reproduction class
It's a pleasure to see such motivation in our students. Isn't that Bruno and Jesse who graduated last year?
There's a lot of students here I've never seen before...

Crowd

What a crowd! You must be a very popular teacher!
Nope. Reproduction class...

Mess

What is this mess?
Aerodynamics lesson...

The order

 In multiplication, the order doesn't affect the result... John, change place with Anna. Alice, move over there! As I was saying, the order doesn't affect the result...

Pie

Studying during lunch time? Just don't take too long or the pie will be over.
Really? Pie for dessert?
No!

Homework

I know! This time not even I believe!

Such a girl

So, you boild this enzyme...
Sir, tis smells bad! Ughhh
Don't be such a girl!
But sir, I am a girl!
Exactly.

Mitosis

This reminds me of a joke. What did the virus tell the bacteria? "You're big but not two" The bacteria divided! C'mon! Mitosis! When you have to explain the joke it is not funny anymore.

Wait for the bell

That's all. Pack and wait for the bell.
Trrriimm
End of school day?
Nope. PE lesson.

Stop copying

The deoxiribonucleic acid unwinds... stop copying and pay attention... so it starts replicating. Any question?
Didn't understand anything. Can you repeat?